Long winter day! Cozy winter night! 

So it’s been a long winter Monday, not a bad day, a decent day but a long tiring one! Those sort of days. So when I came home to an empty warm home and full fridge, I was honestly like …. This is bliss! 

I jumped in the shower and used my new shampoo and conditioner, that I received for my birthday months ago from the lovely Fiona, but as my hair has been non-existent you don’t tend to use much shampoo so this year I have literally only got through one lot of shampoo and conditioner. 

My new one is very spa smelling!  It’s fushi’s  Arman and Amalaki herbal shampoo. Full of lots of amazing stuff like vitamin b5 argan oil and is lovely for my new baby hair!   

And since I’ve been using it everyone has commented how thick my hair is, so i reckon it’s working a treat for my hair! I also rub the Fushi’s really good hair oil  (also from Fiona) into my little locks after a shower! It’s meant to be put on the night before and you wash it out but I just use it all the time! Before bed when I wake up! 

 
All the fushi products I use are free from parabans and chemicals and full of good stuff! 
  
Look at all that hair, and yes I now have a grey patch! But that’s what hair dye is for! (Eventually) 

So, post shower I slipped on my new cozy slippers and painted my nails in my favourite sparkly little Ondine non- toxic nail varnish with a cup of pukka organic herbal tea and a copy of vogue! 

   
   

I’m in my little world of quiet winter cozy night happiness. 

 

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Sunshine is coming. 

  
So, I’ve been really melancholy the past few days, and if I haven’t been ‘meh’ then I’ve been raging or if I haven’t been raging I’ve been sick. So this last week really had taken a turn for the worst as I start the 5 year journey on tamoxifen. 

Can I handle it? Well honestly I’m not sure. But I’ve only done 6-7 days so I’m giving it a chance. I’ve had the sickness and headaches that was so bad one day this week I didn’t get out of bed apart from to be sick. 

Poor old Cassie had to be my nurse again, running off to the chemist for migrane tablets to try to take the edge off the pain. It’s made me feel like I’m never going to be free from this disease and its side effects. 

I look at my finger nails and they are pulling away from the beds, my head and stomach have finally settled but I feel like I’m recovering from the flu, all fatigued and emotional, when at the start of the week I felt lovely. I mean I felt full of energy and its like its all drained away and all I feel capable of is to lie down and rest… Wrapped up as I’m freezing (but in layers so that when the hot flashes hit I can get cool!) 

I shouldn’t moan I’m a mere handful (large handful) of days away from a sunshine holiday and I honestly can’t wait to go. I can’t wait to be laying by the pool and chilling out. 2 weeks in the sunshine is definitely needed after this year! 

I’ve been 70/30 good / bad eating most of my 30 is the odd drink to be honest and pasta… Not that pasta is bad but it doesn’t fit with the keto diet I like to practice to reduce my chances of the dreaded C coming back plus it’s what makes me feel the best in myself. I practice a moderate keto diet so it’s probably more of what you would called a balanced diet that favours vegetables and fats rather than favouring protein or complex carbs. I think I should probably address it as a balanced diet from now on as sometimes when things are labelled people fear what you are doing is a fad diet or this or that but my current eating habits have come from the path of a former strict keto diet. 

But this style of eating has meant that even though I’m on medication and I can’t train how I used to, I have still lost 7ibs in 4 weeks and am safely under the 11stone milestone I wanted to be. Now for a couple more weeks I want to tip the balance back to 80/20% so 80% good rather than 70 and see if I can loose another couple of pounds. The new medication I’m on, tamoxifen, can cause weight gain but I’m hoping that won’t happen to me. I’m pretty sure it will be holiday weight gain not medication! 🙈

Right I’m going to move my butt cheeks and start digging out the summer clothes! A summer holiday in winter… This is going to be weird!  

   
Training face from earlier in the week! 
  
Nails from a couple of weeks ago… They look even worse now 🙈 but hopefully they will sort themselves out.